The Ideal Love Partner

I want to clear that the following list is for a romantic partner. Not a work, investment, entrepreneurial, or club partner. However, these may overlap and conjoin together, depending on the partner you want or can find. Love languages, values, lifestyle, personalities, future plans and all that can be identical in some ways, and/or opposite in others, which may turn out to make a beautiful pair.

My love languages:

1. Quality time, or just time, like b-ing next to me. Loyalty and attention.

2. Compliments on ALL OF ME

3. Conversations/brainstorming

4. Adventure

5. Emotional Connection

6. Physical Touch

7. Dual Creation

8. To B Understood

9. Protective Partner

So let's break these languages down and discuss why they are important for me, and likely many other kinds of B-ings.

1. Quality time, loyalty & attention

One area of life I missed out on as a result of an isolating upbringing was quality time. I remember once playing a board game with my parents and brother when I was 4-5, and ironically the board game was called Sorry! . Otherwise, I haven't experience long term loyalty within any kind of relationship or support, period. For what I believe in, stand for, who I am, and the quality of my character. These aspects of me have been overlooked by everyone I've known. I have been invisible and disrespected for much of my life, like I don't exist, and I have been okay with that until recently. As we know, I was completely neglected as a child. So, undivided attention is a must too.

2. Compliments on ALL OF ME

Many of us have not received verbal compliments from previous or current partners. Or, if we did, it was on the areas of ourselves that we don't care about compliments for, AS MUCH as we want other areas of ourselves to be noticed, admired, and possibly praised. Compliments feel good for everyone. It is important to know what kind of compliments make your partner feel the best, and to see the whole b-ing.

3. Conversations/brainstorming

For many folks, great conversation is a must, and although it may not be the backbone of every relationship, nor am I stating I'm the best linguist, it is key to know what kind of conversations you and your partner prefer, and whether or not you are compatible in that compartment. I am observant and thoughtful, so I like to point out certain patterns I notice. I like to discuss my interests. I like to plan and dream of the future. I have entrepreneurial and investment/biz ideas regularly and would like someone to bounce ideas off of and to build them together. Now, this doesn't correlate to a necessity of b-ing replicas of each other's minds because each partner is meant to have their own thoughts, ideas, experiences, and knowledge. When you can work with your partner on bizness projects and general life, then you can ensure there will be an equal exchange of thoughts and opinions.

Discussing feelings is also important. Having open discussions about how the other may feel about you, about something you said, or something you did that may have hurt them is rather necessary in a relationship, don't you think? Truthfully, if you are a solid match, you get to a point where you know each other like the back of your hand and these problems become less frequent. Taking into consideration what your romantic partner, if you choose to have one, Your feelings and experiences wrap into your sleeping dreams as well, not just your waking dreams. Plus, dreams are fun to interpret and share with another.

4. Adventure

When you take each other on adventures and enjoy them equally so, there will never be a dull moment in your life, or.. in the bedroom ;) Truth be told, when you work in an office or another regular day job of sorts, and then you come home and cook or order carry out, and watch a show together, there won't be very much spice or excitement in the bedroom. Sure, those activities are indeed lovely and peaceful in its simple pleasure and for winding down, but if it's an everyday activity, it will feel routine and stale. If you don't travel or leave for spontaneous thrills a couple times a month, so long as you can afford it (mindset!), then you are missing a whole other area of experience in a quality relationship.

5. Emotional Connection

Ah feelings and intimacy. Bonding over the chemicals and patterns they elicit from your b-ing. Delving into the soul and heart to show the other how much you care and they will do the same for you. When there is an emotional imbalance, say one partner is needy and vulnerable while the other is distant and avoidant, this is no connection at all, and will result in major complications that may have a lasting sting. When you have two emotionally secure and mature individuals, the benefits of security, comfort, ease, and joy will radiate off both and create a lasting dynamic that keeps on giving!

6. Physical Touch

Love is not always communicated with words, The physical is the most obvious form of affection and these behaviors mean more than words, typically. There's not much that needs explaining here, so long as your partner knows what your love languages are and you know theres. If you feel safe with them, physical touch should arise no fear, only endorphins, deeper connection, and pleasure.

7. Dual Creation

Creating art together rather than a child is just as magical, if not more so, than the latter.

8. To B Understood

Everyone wants to b understood. I have spent all of my life b-ing misunderstood. To know you don't have to explain yourself to someone because they know you and they get you, and they may anticipate your response to something, lifts such a burden off of someone. They may even b able to read your mind just through the eyes or minuet cues only they pick up. To B accepted as I am.

9. Protective Partner

To me, it is nice to know the other person cares to stand up for you, allowing you to fight your own battles when you want. There are some battles you can handle on your own and others, it would be nice, if they would pitch in and help or guard you and defend you because it shows they really care. It also shows they fully stand beside you and believe in you and your Truth. That they recognize and honor who you are and your values. Sometimes you may be more equipped to handle a situation in their defense. So it goes both ways. If your partner does not communicate these needs or is incompatible and doesn't assert themselves naturally where they instinctively feel their partner would like help, then they are not the one for you.